futility – k.s.a

don’t tell me your i love you’s

with your fingers

deep inside me

with hot breath against my neck

wafting smoke and last night’s whiskey

don’t tell me your i love you’s

when the darkness

hides your face

when you need it whispered back

forcing feeling and my embrace

what is love if we are broken

how can lovers

love at all

if the heart that stores my life source

is a stone that lives to fall


Hello there!

The Oscars oscars hi waving abigail breslin

Since I’m terrible at introductions and don’t feel like having an awkward first post talking about myself, I think I’ll just dive right in with a tag post. (Also because I am so busy with exams and uni I embarrassingly haven’t finished a book recently enough to review one). I couldn’t seem to find the creator of the tag, so I’m sorry it’s uncredited, let me know if you know the source!

So, the Book Life tag…

1. Who would your parents be?

This is actually pretty hard, because the majority of books tend to have either a single-parent run household as the other parent died in some tragic event (which our protagonist only finds out the true details of halfway through the book…the thick plottens…), or the parents are in the background and we don’t find out much about them.

But I’ll go with the real-life parents in The Glass Castle by Jeannette Walls, even though, I admit, they were pretty bad parents. I just really like the free lifestyle the children ended up having, and in their rather messed-up way, the parents did really love their children.

2. Who would be your sister?

Violet Baudelaire, from A Series of Unfortunate Events. She’s gutsy, super smart, and somehow NEVER seems to lose her damn inventing ribbon even though they travel to hell and back over the novels.

3. Who would be your brother?

Simon Lewis, from The Mortal Instruments. Even though he would also work as my best friend, I feel like he would make the most adorably geeky, protective brother who you could simultaneously watch vampire movies with (throwback to 2011 obsessions)  while having sibling banter. I don’t actually know why I need a protective brother though, my world is considerably lacking in demons and cult-leader dad-figures.

4. Who would be your pet?

Fat Louie from The Princess Diaries! He is basically me in cat form – he is ginger, loves eating, gets bored easily and basically, is a cat. In my uncreative childhood stage I used to copy pictures of him to try and improve my cat-drawing skills.


5. Where would you live?

I’m sorry but I can’t even try to be original here. Middle Earth is the dream. It has every type of landscape so you can have holiday houses in every possible terrain, from snowy mountain huts to hidden forest gems. I sound like a fictional travel agent.

6. Where would you go to school?

Hogwarts, obviously. Otherwise definitely Malory Towers. Those books made me desperately want to go to boarding school, play lacrosse, memorise French verbs (why do all British books mention this?) and go night swimming.

7. Who would be your best friend?

Nehemia from Throne of Glass. She seems like such a loyal friend, she speaks a ton of languages that she could teach me, and she is way more powerful than she seems – who knows what adventures we could experience?

8. Who would be your significant other?

Luna Lovegood, from Harry Potter. Or Lux Lisbon from the Virgin Suicides. These are actually not my true choices but for the sake of blondes and alliteration…


That’s it for this tag, I should *really* stop procrastinating and hit the books for my exam. I have no one to tag, so I’ll do a generic “I tag YOU, reader!”

Feel free to comment anything – feedback, suggestions, some of your dramatic poetry from grade nine.